Sunday, May 23, 2010

The Age Thing: Part I

Sooo, John Travolta, 56, and wife Kelly Preston Travolta are expecting another child. She is 47, about the same age I was when I became a mom again. (Although, I admit, not to a reincarnated child.) Why does this make me happy? Because my children will have a role model of a famous kid with an older mom? Because one day on the playground, my kids will be able to look at me and Kelly Preston having a chat and know--not ALL moms are young and pretty and energetic? Vacuous, yes, but it's the kind of think I thing about.

Right now, some people still say, 'You look young enough to be their mom' when I tell them I'm their grandmother. But that won't last. It won't be long before everyone looks askance at me when Sun and Raine call me mom in public. Will people look askance at Kelly Preston when she's 65 at her child's high school graduation?

Probably not. She can afford all the high maintenance costs, so at 65, she can look 35 if she wants to. As far as maintenance is concerned, I can't even afford to pay attention. Soon enough, there won't even be the odd person who says, 'You look young enough....'

Then, everyone will give that questioning look. And I'll feel compelled to explain our situation over and over and perhaps break down into sobs like I did with the couple from Mason, Ohio, whom I chanced to meet as Sun and I took a stroll along a wooden path. 'Our children don't always turn out like we expected,' the woman said, dripping with sympathy as I explained to her that Skye is  my grandson and that my husband and I have custody of two of our grandchildren. 'No. But being a mom again is a blessing,' I began with my standard reply to dripping sympathy. 'Especially after a tragedy.' However, by the time I got to the word 'tragedy,' my voice had cracked and to my own amazement, my eyes teared. I intended to add, 'Look at John Travolta and Kelly Preston...' but couldn't get the words out. The couple smiled, nodded, and made a polite exit. Soon, Sun came running back to me from the duck pond, 'Mommy, look!' and I wiped the tears away.

Right now, he sees me as his Mommy. Not as his grandmommy. To him, I'm the perfect age, whatever age I am, to be his mommy. One day, that will change. He will look at his peers with their young mommies and then at me, and he will know the difference. How we prepare our children for this and the many other moments that will be unique in their lives because they're being raised by their grandparents occupies my mind even more than John Travolta, Kelly Preston, and my low-maintenance march into advancing middle age.

1 comment:

Lisa said...

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